Restroom wisdom

The best way to a man's heart is to saw his breast plate open.
–Women's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

Don't trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die.
–Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

Beauty is only a light switch away.
–Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North Carolina.

I've decided that to raise my grades I must lower my standards.
–Houghton Library, Harvard University. Cambridge, Massachusetts.

Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" it's "Hi, how are you?"
–Rest stop off Route 81. West Virginia.

God made pot. Man made beer. Whom do you trust?
– The Irish Times, Washington, D.C.

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
–The Bayou, Baton Rouge,Louisiana.

No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of
putting up with her crap.
–Men's Room, Linda's Bar and Grill. Chapel Hill, North Carolina.

At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry.
–Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea, Tucson, Arizona.

It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
–Written in the dust on the back of a bus. Wickenburg, Arizona.

Make love, not war.–Hell, do both, get married!
–Women's restroom, The Filling Station. Bozeman, Montana.

God is dead. -Nietzsche; Nietzsche is dead. -God
–The Tombs Restaurant. Washington, D.C.

If voting could really change things, it would be illegal.
–Revolution Books. New York, New York.

A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you're
going to have trouble with it.
–Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort. Dallas, Texas

"English pigs out of Ireland, Mens loo, Irish times. Washington DC"

Your womans 'rule of thumb' comment was pretty ironic seeing as 'rule of thumb' is from the medieval times when a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick as long as it was thinner than his thumb.

Don't trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die.
–Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL


Mr. Garrison said that one in South Park the movie.

"I don't write on walls" – Men's room, Western Maryland College

"While you're reading what I've put, you might be pissing on your foot"

some pub loo that I can't remember.

Stetson's has some pretty lame political commentary on the walls. Not that I hang out there a lot, or anything.

The men's room in Ben's Chili Bowl has slate walls and a box of chalk.

The men's room at the Irish Times used to have some good ones:

"If God is Love and Love is Blind, is Ray Charles God?"


"Fred Flintstone bears no shoes"

"All Scousers must die" Portland Arms, Manchester, England.

Originally posted by Rob_Gee_a.k.a _Guiny:
Mr. Garrison said that one in South Park the movie.

i think it's a bukowski quote, but he prolly picked it up off some shithouse walls…

Confucius say 'Man who screws woman on ground gets piece on earth.'

Don't remember where i read this one!