Anna Nicole Smith Dead
Zsa Zsaâ??s husband says he could be babyâ??s dad
Prince Frederick von Anhalt claims he had decade-long affair with Anna Nicole Smith…
Prince Frederick von Anhalt claims he had decade-long affair with Anna Nicole Smith…
I don't know if I'd go so far as to say that she was our Princess Di, but she was a Candle in the Wind.
I know this is going to shock you guys, but there's a chance I may be the babies dad too.
i only took her up the ass, so i don't think i'm in the running
If that kid turns out to be a real prince…well, that would be fabulous. Then she would be our Di fer sure.
<img src="http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y25/team_dupek/558e452b.gif" alt=" - " />
Together at last!
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Dr.Perper?
<img src="http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y25/team_dupek/558e452b.gif" alt=" - " />
Together at last!
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Dr.Perper?
I really am a total loser…. evidently I was the only male in the whole of the USA who wasn't knocking the bottom out of Ms. Smith.
Originally posted by Surly Bonds:I usually just shake my head at your posts, but this time you managed to make me seriously crack up laughing. Thank you, sir. :)
She's getting better.
Yet another Python reference…
In what was probably the most glaring example of poor judgement and lack of self respect in my history of such, I spent a year dating a girl who reminds me A LOT of Anna Nicole Smith. She was hot and she was a disaster.
A 42 car pileup with lipstick on it.
I had been warned about her by virtually everyone I knew. Previous boyfriends told of the horrors in store for me. But in spite of it, like a priapic Columbus, I navigated with my dick and planted my flag of discovery square on koo-koo bird island.
She was on at least eight different kinds of medication. This might have been a positive thing, what with her being a mental patient and all, but her decision to mix these happy pills with vodka turned her into, shall we say, a bit of a mess. Imagine a slobbering runway model with rubber bones trying to walk in cha-cha heels. She was every bit as embarassing – sometimes WORSE – than Anna Nicole's displays on her reality show. After many, many attempts to impress upon her what a retarded bummer she became after imbibing, I got fed up and tape recorded her ramblings to play back to her Raymond & Peter style. You'll be able to hear these on a snappy little album I'm working on, but for now, a brief transcription:
A: (sobbing, slurring) "I like karaoke, and you don't understand that."
or this chestnut:
A: (crying, hyperventilating) "I wanna go to The Birchmere to eat food but you'll be mad at me if I eat food!"
Me: I will not get mad at you for eating food. Food is the one thing you've consistantly eaten more of than anything else, and I'm comfortable with that.
A: WHY DO YOU HATE MY FRIENDS!!?? (collapses unconscious)
I could tell stories for days. Her mom (who I later learned can't fucking read) pointed to me as a negative influence and her daughter moved away somewhere. It was an unremitting nightmare. But she was, like, hot, dude!
Life is short for some, but it's hard to muster any feelings at all for someone who was barely there for it in the first place. I'd recommend avoiding chicks on meds, and if you can't, record every pathetic thing they do and say for entertainment's sake, just like the E! Network did with Anna. In the end it's all that can be salvaged.
<img src="http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/dayart/aponline/49896.3OBIT-ANNA-NICOLE-SMITH.sff.jpg" alt=" - " />
Tonight I heard Anna Nicole eulogized on a news program with the word " Superstar " … Holy Hell, that term has sure slipped since it was first applied to dynamic showfolk like Sinatra and Pavorotti. They really should create a new title for this current breed of slurring, stumbling messes like Ms. Smith … perhaps " Stuporstar " would be more appropriate.
A 42 car pileup with lipstick on it.
I had been warned about her by virtually everyone I knew. Previous boyfriends told of the horrors in store for me. But in spite of it, like a priapic Columbus, I navigated with my dick and planted my flag of discovery square on koo-koo bird island.
She was on at least eight different kinds of medication. This might have been a positive thing, what with her being a mental patient and all, but her decision to mix these happy pills with vodka turned her into, shall we say, a bit of a mess. Imagine a slobbering runway model with rubber bones trying to walk in cha-cha heels. She was every bit as embarassing – sometimes WORSE – than Anna Nicole's displays on her reality show. After many, many attempts to impress upon her what a retarded bummer she became after imbibing, I got fed up and tape recorded her ramblings to play back to her Raymond & Peter style. You'll be able to hear these on a snappy little album I'm working on, but for now, a brief transcription:
A: (sobbing, slurring) "I like karaoke, and you don't understand that."
or this chestnut:
A: (crying, hyperventilating) "I wanna go to The Birchmere to eat food but you'll be mad at me if I eat food!"
Me: I will not get mad at you for eating food. Food is the one thing you've consistantly eaten more of than anything else, and I'm comfortable with that.
A: WHY DO YOU HATE MY FRIENDS!!?? (collapses unconscious)
I could tell stories for days. Her mom (who I later learned can't fucking read) pointed to me as a negative influence and her daughter moved away somewhere. It was an unremitting nightmare. But she was, like, hot, dude!
Life is short for some, but it's hard to muster any feelings at all for someone who was barely there for it in the first place. I'd recommend avoiding chicks on meds, and if you can't, record every pathetic thing they do and say for entertainment's sake, just like the E! Network did with Anna. In the end it's all that can be salvaged.
<img src="http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/dayart/aponline/49896.3OBIT-ANNA-NICOLE-SMITH.sff.jpg" alt=" - " />
Tonight I heard Anna Nicole eulogized on a news program with the word " Superstar " … Holy Hell, that term has sure slipped since it was first applied to dynamic showfolk like Sinatra and Pavorotti. They really should create a new title for this current breed of slurring, stumbling messes like Ms. Smith … perhaps " Stuporstar " would be more appropriate.
Instead of sending tens of thousands of new troops to Iraq to kill time why not just send Howard K. Stern, the Dr. Kevorkian of the Bar Association? Just tell Howard that he stands to inherit every mullah's moolah and Muqtada al-Sadr's will be found on a sidewalk with a needle up his arm by weekend. Besides, what better way to put a perky spin on a losing war than have Mary Hart giddily reporting on Howard's latest victim each day from Baghdad?
It's evening…closing time for merchants and medical labs. In the shadows behind the city morgue in Hollywood, Florida, there forms a lengthy line of skinny, meth-soaked mullet-heads, smoking and swilling beer while anxiously awaiting their turn to hump the splotchy corpse of Anna Nicole. This unique opportunity has been discreetly made available to the loathsome locals for fifty bucks a throw by an enterprising morgue janitor. Thin streams of fresh semen flow down Anna's chalk-white legs as they limply hang over each side of the large metal gurney on which her bloated carcass lies. Her trunk noisily farts as each new customer mounts her and thrusts his rank pecker into her cold, scabby cavern. One leering onlooker videotapes the sorry spectacle, which will soon become the most watched internet clip of the week. This will, naturally, spark a trend of celebrity corpse-fucking videos, with some of the more daring and inventive participants manning shovels and crowbars to seek classic mausoleum meat like Mae West, Marilyn Monroe and Natalie Wood. The bold fad will take on a grisly new dimension when many of the most popular young film, TV and recording stars will be murdered in their homes, on camera, and then savagely violated to the awe and delight of You-Tubers everywhere.
Finally, something I'd want to see Angelina Jolie in. . .
<img src="http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y25/team_dupek/a2075386.gif" alt=" - " />
Finally, something I'd want to see Angelina Jolie in. . .
<img src="http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y25/team_dupek/a2075386.gif" alt=" - " />
Dr. Feelgood Chopra