The Great Headline thread

kosmo wrote:
Camilla Decorates Royal Household With Sick Children

Crossed posted to the JA thread

I would say the biggest flaw is some of these kids don’t make it through the whole season and have to be replaced with other sick kids,  the juice on this one isn’t worth the squeeze as the holiday season lasts weeks.
This kind of decoration is better for a one off gala events
At least that has been my experience

Have you seen the film Salo? Part of the joy of children as decorations is when they die.

Christmas lights spark brief debate over resemblance to 'underpants on a line'

Oklahoma man driving stolen vehicle caught with rattlesnake, uranium, whiskey and firearm

the sub headline is great too:
Stephen Jennings joked with officers that he was creating a "super snake."

Virginia man dies after bear shot in tree falls on him

SideThatch wrote:
Virginia man dies after bear shot in tree falls on him

There’s a conservation metaphor somewhere in there.

Julian, wrote:

SideThatch wrote:
Virginia man dies after bear shot in tree falls on him

There’s a conservation metaphor somewhere in there.

also karma

kosmo wrote:

Julian, wrote:

SideThatch wrote:
Virginia man dies after bear shot in tree falls on him

There’s a conservation metaphor somewhere in there.

also karma

Maybe even a Russian metaphor too

^ master level headline

SideThatch wrote:
^ master level headline

Agreed. Hand them the Pulitzer now.

I feel like that Simpsons bit where Lisa see a sign for a "Yahoo Serious Festival"

Tis the season an oldie but a goodie

Christmas service accidentally prints Tupac's "Hail Mary" lyrics

Tis the season in St. Mary’s County

Man arrested for disrupting Christmas church services, pouring whiskey into holy water, deputies say

We’ve all contemplated this once right?

https://www.kplctv.com/2024/12/27/man-arrested-disrupting-christmas-church-services-pouring-whiskey-into-holy-water-deputies-say

A witness followed Von Goetz as he exited the church to make sure he was leaving and saw him then assault another person by throwing tangerines.

Texas cheerleader, 17, is charged with animal cruelty for 'poisoning her rival's show goat'

Very Tonya

Size matters l!

Brussels sprouts will be 25% bigger this year, and may be sexier too
https://bsky.app/profile/theguardian.com/post/3lddyrkw3ip25

Trump Sends Idiot Son on Futile Mission

Related

Busted! Trump’s Greenland Supporters Were Homeless and Socially Disadvantaged People Bribed With Hotel Dinners

His son was gathering material for some podcast.

Personally I would like to see the US take over Greenland and also merge with Canada. The Canada thing would have happened in 1776-77 were it but for an accident of history. My understanding is we have tried to buy or acquire Greenland before…

Do I think any of this is likely? No….

But gotta admit it’s damn entertaining and people need to lighten up. Is Trump really serious about any of it!? Probably not….just distraction and fodder for TDS sufferers who embarrass themselves. I mean would it be that terrible to claim Greenland?

I also think we should make Puerto Rico a state and get rid of Maduro in Venezuela.

Instead people want us to spend trillions on the Ukraine losing cause half a world away! Give me a break.

i think the US should buy argentina instead.  i mean, it's a failed state and those people can't handle money so clearly they need the help of someone who understands business, like trump.  how many times has that country collapsed in the past 50 years?  trump could buy it for pennies on the dollar, with the leftover change from purchasing greenland (a country with actual value, resources, etc.).  would make a nice addition to america's growing empire.