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When reality reflects The Onion (redux)

jaguar
Joined: October 28, 2001 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 3869
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) May 26, 2012 at 09:25 PM UTC #
This story could just as easily make the 'Bacon' thread, or even the 'Beer' thread. Could be right out of a John Waters movie! She couldn't have picked a better named store either.

Bacon Lover In Piggly Wiggly Rampage

Make sure you read the entire article, right down to the very end. It's full of all kinds of insanity!!!  :o :D ;D :D :o
beetsnotbeats
Joined: April 26, 2002 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 5756
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) May 26, 2012 at 11:18 PM UTC #
Jaguar wrote:
This story could just as easily make the 'Bacon' thread, or even the 'Beer' thread. Could be right out of a John Waters movie! She couldn't have picked a better named store either.

Bacon Lover In Piggly Wiggly Rampage

Make sure you read the entire article, right down to the very end. It's full of all kinds of insanity!!!  :o :D ;D :D :o


And the comments from "Top Commenters" are just as classy. Makes me glad that "minority" babies now outnumber white.
jaguar
Joined: October 28, 2001 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 3869
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) May 27, 2012 at 12:14 AM UTC #
I must have some sort of over-active virus protection going on because I can't see any comments. Or maybe it's the proxy server I changed to recently which I'm convinced has slowed down my surfing potential. Sometimes you just can't win for being careful!
beetsnotbeats
Joined: April 26, 2002 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 5756
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) May 31, 2012 at 08:47 PM UTC #
Whoops, nothing to see here….
sweetcell
Joined: July 18, 2006 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 22608
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) June 08, 2012 at 09:33 PM UTC #
must-read: http://ohno-polio.tumblr.com/post/24599718126

"Tip for modern adulterers: If you?re planning to cheat on your wife of 10 years by awkwardly hitting on the model seated next to you on your flight out of Los Angeles, make sure she isn?t live-tweeting the entire miserable experience to her 13,000 followers"
vansmack
Joined: October 04, 2001 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 19725
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) June 08, 2012 at 10:34 PM UTC #
sweetcell wrote:
must-read:


Brilliant.

The models are why I only fly where Virgin flies.
beetsnotbeats
Joined: April 26, 2002 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 5756
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) June 18, 2012 at 02:31 PM UTC #
Massachusetts cyclist attacked by man swinging sausages

BROCKTON, Mass. (AP) - A Massachusetts man is facing charges for allegedly attacking a bicyclist with sausage links and a wrench before making off with jewelry and the bike.

Police say Michael Baker is scheduled to be arraigned Monday on charges including assault and battery with a dangerous weapon in connection with the Sunday morning attack.

According to The Enterprise, the victim told police his assailant at first started swinging a string of sausage links at him before hitting him with a wrench. The victim was hospitalized.

Police say Baker was caught a short time later with the bike and a wrench.

Police later found that sausages and other food had been stolen from a food stand at the Brockton Fairgrounds.
sweetcell
Joined: July 18, 2006 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 22608
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) June 19, 2012 at 05:33 AM UTC #
so there's this kid on youtube, ReactionResponseKING, whose shtick is eating ridiculous thing (hot peppers, the cinnamon challenge, menthos + coke, etc) and filming the outcomes.  pretty standard fare is this post-jackass era, really.  what makes this video a classic are the auto-generated captions.

1) go to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JnVOFSs75RA, start & immediately pause video (skip the commercial if one is served to you)
2) press the "CC" button in the video player's bottom toolbar
3) select "transcribe audio", click OK to the pop-up disclaimer
4) lol

hondacarland & drug use dead,
SC
jaguar
Joined: October 28, 2001 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 3869
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) August 11, 2012 at 01:06 AM UTC #
Four bears break into cabin; drink 100 beers

The party was wild enough. Can you imagine the hangover period!?!
jaguar
Joined: October 28, 2001 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 3869
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) August 12, 2012 at 06:44 PM UTC #
Every soon-to-be father's dream come true:

Study: Oral Sex Cures Morning Sickness

The 1st comment is a classic! Even as a woman, I had to laugh.

Sorry ladies, but this finding is just too crazy not to post. But do take note: that stuff must be from the biological father or it's no cure for you.
i am gay and i like cats
Joined: Unknown
Posts: 0
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) August 12, 2012 at 07:41 PM UTC #
oral sex in the morning . . . also cures a bad relationship.
sweetcell
Joined: July 18, 2006 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 22608
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) August 27, 2012 at 09:39 PM UTC #
grateful wrote:
If you live in Arizona, you could be pregnant even before you have sex.

http://www.examiner.com/article/new-law-arizona-states-pregnancy-begins-two-weeks-before-conception

so.  fucking.  ridiculous.

how can these people take themselves seriously?  how can they not be embarrassed by their so-called "logic"?
grateful
Joined: October 15, 2008 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 11564
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) August 28, 2012 at 02:04 PM UTC #
They'll feel empowered if Romney gets elected.  Paul Ryan's reaction to the Akin mindfuck was to agree with him, saying that rape is just another means of conception…HuffPo link complete with video.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/paul-slansky-/paul-ryan-said-something-_b_1832377.html
beetsnotbeats
Joined: April 26, 2002 at 05:01 AM UTC
Posts: 5756
Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux) August 28, 2012 at 07:19 PM UTC #
Curiosity rover to beam Will.i.am song from Mars

Clearly, with so much of their collective brain power being used on the actual mission, there was nothing left for music.
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